It’s Time to Do You

For those who don’t know the meaning of “do you,” it kind of slang for take care of yourself, do what makes you happy, get yourself together.  Knowing when it’s time to do you can make troubling situations less stressful, down times happier, and even keep you calm when you want to blow up.

If you are in a relationship that is going downhill or has hit a roadblock and you see no future in site, it’s time to “do you.”  The first step is to end it.  That’s right; “Peace out, see you later, it’s been real but I’ve got to go.”  Sometimes it’s nothing that the man has done wrong, but you want to move forward and he is happy and content with the way things are.

The hardest part of leaving a relationship is the reality of being alone.  Sometimes you feel that way even when you are with someone and this is a sign that it’s time to call it quits.  Don’t let yourself feel bad about the breakup for too long.  Go out, get a mani and a pedi, call up your girls for a night out, go to a movie, shopping, or just get comfy and pick up a good book.  If the relationship was going well to begin with, it won’t be long before you find ways to fill the void.

If your children are, as we call it, “acting up,” it’s time to put your foot down and “do you.”  You pay the bills so you make the rules.  Some people are sure to say, “You should have done that when they were younger,” but it’s never too late to say, “You know what, I’ve had it and now I’m doing me.  Either you get it together or you get out.”

Now you can’t do that with minors, but young adults who don’t have a care in the world because they have had it too easy, you can say, “Check out the real world and come back and tell me how wonderful it is.”

I’m not saying throw your kids out on the street, but for the working parents, especially single parents; we sort of use video games, sneakers, laptops, and Iphones as a way to reward our children.  Right or wrong, it’s how we try to make up for the fact that we have to work.  This leads to a feeling of entitlement that goes on right into adulthood, and if you’re not careful, you now have an adult telling you what you SHOULD be doing for them.

When you have decided that it is now your time, you will then realize that they have to either get in the game or sit on the bench, preferably a bench located outside of your residence.

Employment can be another big issue.  So many people have dreams of starting a business, offering services, or doing freelance work, but somebody has to put food on the table.  If this is your situation, the key here is to develop a strategic plan.  Set yourself up so you can “do you.”  This is not a decision to be made hastily, but carefully planned out so you can cover your expenses while you explore your dreams. 

Start out small, part-time, weekends, etc.  If you find yourself making a few extra dollars going large scale might be an option.  Keep in mind everyone cannot quit their day job to follow a dream or an idea.  In fact, most people cannot, but over time and with patience and persistence, you can develop something lucrative that you can finally say, “I’m out of here, I’m doing me.”

Whether its relationships, children, employment or anything else in life that has you down.  Take some time out for yourself – you deserve it, you are entitled to it, and you will enjoy it.